It’s just a week away and while dads across the world think they have a whole week or more to shop- its time the truth is revealed. Everywhere you look online there are lists and tips about what mom really wants for mother’s day. Flowers go on sale, perfume becomes a hot ticket item and kids from preschool to middle school are preparing hand made cards and crafts just so mom knows how much she is loved. Then of course, there is jewelry and lots of it. From necklaces to earrings and everything in between – mom is being laced with shiny and sparkly jewels that will serve to remind her just how special she is. Yep- that about sums it up! But what does mom really want?

Even if you asked her, she wouldn’t tell you the truth. She would simply say, “I don’t need a gift.” This is one of the worst lies that women tell. Of course they need a gift and they want YOU to figure it out. They don’t want you to thumb through the Sunday times or spend 5 minutes shopping at the closest store to your home to come up with something that looks good wrapped for Mother’s day and they certainly don’t want to tell you what they want. It may be easier to start with things they don’t want.

Most moms do not want pots and pans. Unless the mother in your life is a culinary genius who spends hours cooking and catering meals, she isn’t interested in a dollar store frying pan so she can prepare your eggs. She probably doesn’t want a stock pot big enough to hold the rabbit for your grandmother’s rabbit stew recipe either. In fact, one great way to know you are never going to eat rabbit stew is to buy her the pot. She also doesn’t want a new spatula, cutlery, or anything that isn’t really for her, but for the entire family. Giving her a gift that quite simply reminds her of her wifely or motherly duties without making life any easier for her – should be scratched from the list immediately. If you want to give a kitchen gadget, then going for something that makes life easier such as a Kitchen Aid mixer is your best bet. If she loves her coffee more than her children, a Tassimo or Keurig coffee maker can go a long way in helping her enjoy life. And it will be just for her!

Other no-no’s when it comes to Mother’s Day are purses, bags or clothes that she didn’t ask for. Some men and children can pick out pretty hot clothes for mom, BUT unless you are one of them, you are asking for trouble. Not only will she feel obligated to wear it even if it looks bad, but if you buy a size too big – you are headed for a rough couple of days. To a woman, that is as good as calling her fat. On the other hand, if she asks for a specific brand of jeans that cost $200, don’t trade them in for a pair of Lee Easy fits because they looked the same to you. This too will cause a rough road ahead. The fact that you would be willing to buy the $200 jeans, even though you thought it was wasteful and indulgent proves to her how much she is loved!

When it comes to perfume, you also have to tread very carefully. There are some men in this world that are reminiscent of the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz – no brain. They will gleefully give their wife a brand new perfume and exclaim how the receptionist at work wears it and it smells awesome. Wink Wink! Not smart. If you buy her perfume of any kind, make sure it is something she likes, wears, and wants. If the mother in your life doesn’t take long candlelit bubble baths, then forego the bubble bath altogether.

Interestingly, many women do enjoy getting lingerie. Of course, this is a gift that should not be given in front of the kids or in-laws while eating dinner, but a hot idea for a husband is to purchase something sexy for his wife on Mother’s Day. The sheer thought that you went into a Victoria’s Secret and picked out some lacy number in her favorite shade of purple shows you think she’s still got it! And for that, you might just get it.

When it comes to the kids, mom really doesn’t care what they give her. They could give her a scribbled piece of paper with the words I love you written on it and it would make her happy. In fact, kids can give mom potted plants that she will eventually kill or hand made pieces of artwork to clutter up the house – and mom will melt. Why? Because they already gave her the most perfect gift on the day they were born….the gift of being a mother.

Another thing to recognize on Mother’s Day is that it should be her day to be pampered. She gets the remote control, she gets to pick what’s for dinner (or where to go) and the entire rest of the family should clean up and make it appear as if dinner never happened. A gift certificate to a local spa, to get her nails done (without the kids) or for a massage are also great ideas that will come in handy and be appreciated.

As with any gift, mom wants to be remembered. She wants to be thought of on Mother’s Day as more than a wife and provider of food and shelter. She wants to be remembered for being a woman, a person and for all the special and unique qualities that truly make her a special mom. Lastly, she wants to hear a silent but obvious thank you – to know that her family thinks she is the very best mom in the entire world.

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